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How To Build Your Life Around Flow - So That You Enjoy Yourself, Be More Productive and Improve Your Health
By Abby Eagle (2022)
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In this article I am going to present an argument as to why you should build your life around flow and how to build new flow strategies into your life. In case you didn’t know, flow is another word for being in the zone – an optimal state of consciousness in which you perform at your best. So let’s start with three anecdotes.
Some decades ago there was this guy, in his early sixties, in the US dying from cancer. The doctors gave him three months to live. It is expensive dying in the US so he decided to move back to the Island of Ikaria, off the coast of Greece where he was born, to live with his relatives on a vineyard up in the cool mountainside. His wife took care of him in bed but after three months he was spending more time outside helping on the vineyard and over time he helped renovate the property for his extended family and built a social life in the local village. Twenty years later he decides to go back to the US to see the Doctors to show them that he is still alive but to his surprise they had all died.
The second story is back in 1984 during the AIDS epidemic. An American man is dying from AIDS so he sells up and moves to Nepal. About three weeks later his blood profiles were normal. He attributed his healing to the consumption of coconut water but diet is only one factor amongst a radical change in life’s mission, lifestyle and environment.
And then there is Steven Kotler, author of the Rise of Superman. The story that he tells is that he is lying in bed, seriously ill with Lyme’s disease. He is contemplating suicide but his girlfriend drags him out of bed and takes him to the beach with some of his surfer friends. They help him down to the water and give him a long board to ride. He knows how to surf and when a small wave comes along he catches the wave and jumps onto the board – and to his surprise he experiences a profound no-mind state. This is something that he has never experienced before and he is not a meditator or New Age type person so he is really intrigued. Anyway his friends take him back home and his girlfriend feeds him in bed for a couple of weeks until he is strong enough to go surfing once again. Anyway after about six months his health has returned to about 80% of normal. He then begins his research into flow states.
So we have three different stories. The challenge is to map out the key factors that contributed to the incredible improvement in health, healing and longevity.
From Roger Hamilton’s perspective your personality type is your genius. So you need to learn as much as you can about personality type and NLP Meta Programs. Then you need to get clear on your passions and interests – and give yourself permission to spend time developing your passions and interests. Then you need to put yourself in an environment in which you flourish. And then you need to understand your values hierarchy and what motivates you.
Then you take all of that and do a NLP Future Selfing exercise. Map out your present state and your desired outcome – and using questions, statements and commands map out the steps and stages that will get you from the present state to the desired outcome.
Once you are clear about what you want to do then you focus on one task and you set your intention which drives your attention onto the task at hand such that you can focus in and concentrate – then the front of the brain quietens downs – the critical voice disappears and you are plunged into the eternal now of flow – you are in the zone.
Steven Kotler gives the flow process four stages. Everything starts with a struggle – you set a stretch goal – push yourself a bit then take a break. This is the relax and let go phase. So you take a shower, go for a walk, grab a cup of coffee, or tidy your office and then you get back into the activity and you find yourself in flow. The learning and consolidation phase occurs during deep sleep which is why it is important to have a regular routine for meals and bed time.
So if you want to build your life around flow and reap the benefits then:
1. Make a list of the activities that you enjoy.
2. Make a list of the activities that you find challenging but you enjoy the most.
3. Make a list of the activities that if you could partake in that activity it would give you immense pleasure and satisfaction.
4. Make a list of the activities that you have to do – like cleaning and admin activities.
5. Make a list of times in the day when you find it hard to get started or get into an activity
6. Make a note of how you feel in each of the above.
7. What do you think blocks you from taking action? Is there an image in mind, something you say to yourself or a feeling?
8. What do you think motivates you to take action? Is there an image in mind, something you say to yourself or a feeling?
9. What strategies do you use to get through the struggle phase and get into flow? For example, do you check your phone and your email, go onto social media, have something to eat or drink, have a smoke, talk to a friend. Or do you physically tidy your work space and put things in order in preparation for doing the activity that needs to be done?
So at the end of the day if you want to say to yourself, “I had a great day – this was one of the best days of my life” – then you need to build your life around flow.
At this point I need to give you a sidebar. If you find it hard getting started aka procrastination then pay attention to what you say to yourself. Some people may check the clock and think to themselves that they don’t really have enough time to get into the activity so they put it off waiting for when they do have enough time. Others may hesitate because they need space alone free from people, phone calls and other distractions before they can fully immerse themselves into the activity. Others may hesitate because they feel they don’t have the space and time to fully immerse themselves into the activity and produce a perfect result. While others may need permission to get started. Either way the solution is to build the best environment that you can and just take action and do the best that you can.
So you have your action list – you know what you should be doing. But the challenge may be getting started – so rather than wasting time with a stupid activity like checking Facebook, what I suggest you do is review the lists that you wrote and choose any one activity from those lists – and then take immediate action and see where it takes you.
What you should notice is that the activities that get you into flow relate to your personality type, your passions and interests, the environment in which you flourish and your values. In other words the activity has significant meaning. Not necessarily important or necessary but meaningful to you.
Now there are a number of key moments in the day when you may have to kick-start flow – for example, when you get out of bed – after breakfast - after lunch - after dinner. Depending on your job it could be after completing an activity and you have to start a new activity. The answer is to engineer strategies that help you to focus in on an activity such that you get into flow - and then you can piggy back that and start work on a task that needs to be completed.
The more time you spend in flow then the stronger the immune system and the more you will be able to deal with the challenges that life presents to you. And trust me on this one - the next decade is going to bring a lot of challenges for us all - so do your bit - build your life around flow - and teach others how to build their lives around flow.
Here are my notes:
Activities that I enjoy
- writing a script for a video
- working on my website
- designing online courses
- watching YouTube videos
- physical activities
- being in nature
Activities that are challenging but I enjoy the most
- delivering a coaching session
- filming a video
- editing a video in Premiere
- creating images in Photoshop
- building a film set
- painting landscapes on canvas
Activities that would give me immense pleasure and satisfaction
- painting murals
- creating high quality animated videos
- collaborating with other YouTubers
- building a professional film studio
Activities that I have to do at some time
- all admin work
- cleaning
- shopping
- computer maintenance
- bookkeeping and tax preparation
- downsizing
- marketing and advertising
- configure my computer work station
- build a podcasting studio
- website back end maintenance and coding
Activities that I should be doing today
- e.g. filming a video
- e.g. working on my website
If you are interested in coaching using NLP, Hypnotherapy and Meditation then feel free to send me an email and organise a free 20 minute Skype or Zoom session – and if you have not done so then please comment below, and join us over at the Facebook NLP & Hypnotherapy Group. Or at the NLP and Hypnotherapy Meditation Group on this website.
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